Loneliness

LONELINESS

Loneliness is the pain of separation and isolation. From others, from our self, from the truth, from Source. It is where our interbeing is no longer felt.

Intimacy, authenticity and curiosity, whether alone or with another, can soothe the desire for connection, union and wholeness that loneliness speaks of.

I did not feel lonely very often when alone meditating in a cabin for 3-weeks, but at times the loneliness arrived as a deep yearning, gnawing at my core.

I mostly adored being alone for three weeks. I was scared about coming out and having to interact with others. Paradoxically, solitude taught me I was not alone.

However, when I turned my phone on and saw messages coming in, my body was hit with a wave of speechless love. I felt as though I had been in a drought without realising it, and was having my first sip of life-saving water.

I was stunned.

Unexpectedly, I felt wide-open with true gratitude and joy. I felt humbled. I cried. I laughed. I could not speak.

When I did finally call my partner, I kept going silent, feeling overwhelmed and grinning or crying - what sweet nectar to have the attention of another, to have someone to dialogue with and share with. To exist in another's field, and they in yours.

I wondered if I would ever be able to talk freely again - or if I would have to pause to soak in the radiance of each utterance I heard forevermore (I can say that it only took 3 days to be back to incessant chatter haha!)

In recognising how earth-shattering the first taste of human contact was for me, I viscerally experienced how VITAL social connection is. We are social beings. We are wired for community. We need each other.

And there was also a very deep sadness afterwards. To know that so many are isolated and cut off, so many do not feel seen by anyone, so many are disconnected even from themselves, as I have been at many times in my life too, as I often still am. To know loneliness is often most apparent when we are surrounded by people yet still feel alone. To know that loneliness kills.

I will never underestimate the necessity of human contact again. (Even if I still very much need my alone time!) I am all for finding everything you need in yourself etc etc but wow life is so much more beautiful when we live it together.

I hadn't realised how much I was missing other humans until I had them. The mycelial networks might be invisible, but they are what sustains us.

So, in gratitude for all the real connections. The easy ones, the tricky ones, the loving ones, the confrontational ones, the safe ones, the challenging ones, the inspiring ones, the easy-going ones.

May we all recognise the importance of each other.

With love

Megan x