WTF is a breathgasm?

I immediately feel irritated by stuff like this. A part of me ready to feel inadequate, to have another attainment to achieve or another 'nope, my body can't do that' on my list. A part that is fed up with the relentless 'self-development' narratives and our obsession with sex and how women in particular should be around their sexuality. Maybe a part that is a little prudish and still feels we ought not to talk about this stuff publicly?! A part that just wants to rest gaddamit!

And there is another part that also feels curious. A part that longs to feel my creative, sensual, sexual energies flowing more freely, more powerfully. A part that recognises that in order to feel more expansive I must slow down and attune to myself. A part that recognises the damage done by us NOT sharing about sensuality more freely and responsibly. A part that knows what it is like to feel the eroticism of simply being alive. A part that feels tingly when it hears 'breathgasm'.

So this article doesn't sit entirely right with me. A couple of things. Naming a 'breathgasm' (for me) puts the emphasis on some end goal (a hands free orgasm, as the article says), and thus minimises the joy of experimentation without something we are reaching for. Terms like 'keep trying' or 'push the energy up' feel demanding and forceful. And yet...

This practice has been very powerful for me. Sometimes boring, sometimes frustrating, sometimes enlivening, sometimes blissful. Maybe it wouldn't work so well if I had tried it at a different time (I've done some great yoni connection work over the years and therapy for resolving sexual trauma, before this I was pretty blocked from exploring with myself). But now it is a practice that nourishes me. That sometimes awakens my wild, sensual, embodied creatrix!

I'd like to change the terminology personally. From breathgasm to breathsex maybe?! Taking the emphasis off of the goal and on to the process.

I am imagining this could be pretty wonderful for male and intersex bodies too.

Enjoy! x